A New Hope

Long, long ago, in a galaxy far, far away...

Actually, this isn't about a post about an epic space opera. Rather, it's a declaration of hope in my life. Hope is about the only thing that keeps us going in times of tribulation. Hope is powered by faith and produces joy in times of weariness. Hope is a really freakin' good thing to have when you're deeply troubled.

I recently finished reading a book for the second time last night. You know those times where you pick up decently-sized book and finish it cover-to-cover in a single day? That was me with Joshua Harris' Boy Meets Girl. I think I've read it before - that, or he covers a lot of the same info from his book prior, I Kissed Dating Goodbye (which I would also highly recommend).

Anyway, Boy Meets Girl starts off telling Joshua Harris' personal experience with his pre-marriage life - his struggles, past failings and sins, and a revolutionary idea called "courtship." Antiquated as it may sound, courtship is, from what I have read and summised, perhaps the ideal way to develop a relationship with the opposite sex once you are in a position to consider marriage. Even in the Christian world and with many men and women having good intentions about relationships, the various ways which we engage the opposite gender in the pursuit of "The One" can cause not only great harm and disservice to them, but to us as well.

Harris' book is based on sound biblical wisdom and draws from the experience and examples his and others' stories. A lot of them are romantic, most of them have touching endings to them, and each and every one has a very important point to be made. I consider myself a man after God's own heart, or at least a pursuer of it, but there were a lot of things that I was ignorant about before reading this book. Now, even prepping myself for a nasty, painful divorce and trying to start a new life in a foreign state, I feel confident that I will be able to keep my eyes on the prize: first, a dedicated life of service to God and all of His principles, and second, the preparation of a life to receieve the woman that He has custom-tailored exactly for me.

If you haven't read this book, then go buy, borrow, or otherwise acquire a copy of Boy Meets Girl. If you're single for any reason, it's a good read, but if you're married and still malleable, you can read through the book and find a lot of areas that should have been addressed when you were still single. Ideally, a couple should work through this book again when they start courting (you'll find out what the big deal about this courting thing is when you read the book), but it's never too late to apply God's principles for a happy marriage!

My hope is this: that I will develop my faith, my spiritual walk, and the rest of my life for God, and do so with my whole heart. I still dream of a wife (I'm married, but my wife is hardly a a wife at all, and she has already made the decision to be done with me). In fact, I dream of a wedding where I, too, look down the aisle at my bride and realize that there are no regrets in our relationship or our union. I dream of, for the first time in my entire life, being truly at peace with the young woman that God placed in my life (in His perfect timing).

If you're a woman who yearns for marriage, you should pick the book up as well. The book is aimed towards both genders, of course, but there are some very key points about femininity and about the roles husband and wife play in marriage. In the secular feminist society that we live in today, the roles of a man and a woman have been reversed and totally mutilated, rendering them unrecognizable in their current states. Men are weak, fragile, pathetic shells of what God intended, and women are taught to scorn the "traditional" roles of being a mother and homemaker in favor of pursuing careers and the lifestyle of a top-dog. Men don't know how to lead, women don't now how to submit, and neither know how to serve. Unfortunately, the Church is not immune to this, and the poison-laced tentacles of the world have infiltrated even the communities that we are so inclined to trust. I am not trying to say that this imperfection prevents a healthy union in the church - rather, I am implying that the marriage roles are something that definitely need to be addressed.

Personal standards have to change to God's standards. Why? Because our standards are often flawed and based on partially or wholly unimportant factors, we fail to recognize the spouse that God has planted before us - I've seen examples of this time and time again. In fact, I think I've been there, and might have "missed the train" initially in life (thankfully, God is merciful). Women need to develop a love for men not based on presupposed "ideal" qualifications, but rather taking into consideration such factors as, "He is a man I could see myself following," or, "He is a man that will always put God first in a marriage." Likewise, men should be able to calm themselves in order to hear from God, rather than being lead by the nose through their eyes and emotions.

If you've never read one of Joshua Harris' books and you're single, pick up I Kissed Dating Goodbye before you read Boy Meets Girl. The first book gives his perspective before marriage - why he decided to give up noncommital dating, what previous sinful issues he experienced before dedicating his life to God wholly, how he ended up meeting the woman of his dreams. The second book takes place after marriage, and is a recommended reading for the single, divorced, married, and widowed alike.

Read these books. If you've read them before, get your hands on a copy and go through them again. The principles are vital to a good marriage, and are better digested before than during or after.