Ever since Daddy showed me just how much He loves me, something interesting happened.
Satan kept trying to steal it away.
What hit me about His love, though, was not only that it takes priority in my life but that everything else has to bow down to it. "Satan has nothing on me. My Father loves me!" Insert choice childish taunting here.
Mmm. That's a good bit of knowledge to start the day with. Every day, in fact.
Ain't it great?
Aug 21, 2009
He Loves Me
Tonight my Father showed me that He loves me. He told me in no uncertain terms how much He loves me. I couldn't stand it. It didn't make sense, I wasn't worthy of it, and I don't understand it.
The truth is, though, that He loves me... Loves me so very, very much. And this, my friends, is all that matters now. You, the reader, don't matter; my problems in life don't matter; the things people tell me or say about me don't matter; the aches in my life don't matter. All these things pale when I think about and remember just how much He loves me.
I have a Father. And He loves me - He loves me so very, very much.
Aren't you jealous?
You don't have to be.
He loves you, too.
But returning to the subject, He loves me. He loves me more than I can ever comprehend. And that's it. That's all. That's everything. That's the end. I don't need anything more. I'm good, I'm cool, I'm there, I'm happy. This is what I was searching for for so many years.
It's a good day. A very, very good day indeed.
The truth is, though, that He loves me... Loves me so very, very much. And this, my friends, is all that matters now. You, the reader, don't matter; my problems in life don't matter; the things people tell me or say about me don't matter; the aches in my life don't matter. All these things pale when I think about and remember just how much He loves me.
I have a Father. And He loves me - He loves me so very, very much.
Aren't you jealous?
You don't have to be.
He loves you, too.
But returning to the subject, He loves me. He loves me more than I can ever comprehend. And that's it. That's all. That's everything. That's the end. I don't need anything more. I'm good, I'm cool, I'm there, I'm happy. This is what I was searching for for so many years.
It's a good day. A very, very good day indeed.
Jul 26, 2009
A New Hope
Long, long ago, in a galaxy far, far away...
Actually, this isn't about a post about an epic space opera. Rather, it's a declaration of hope in my life. Hope is about the only thing that keeps us going in times of tribulation. Hope is powered by faith and produces joy in times of weariness. Hope is a really freakin' good thing to have when you're deeply troubled.
I recently finished reading a book for the second time last night. You know those times where you pick up decently-sized book and finish it cover-to-cover in a single day? That was me with Joshua Harris' Boy Meets Girl. I think I've read it before - that, or he covers a lot of the same info from his book prior, I Kissed Dating Goodbye (which I would also highly recommend).
Anyway, Boy Meets Girl starts off telling Joshua Harris' personal experience with his pre-marriage life - his struggles, past failings and sins, and a revolutionary idea called "courtship." Antiquated as it may sound, courtship is, from what I have read and summised, perhaps the ideal way to develop a relationship with the opposite sex once you are in a position to consider marriage. Even in the Christian world and with many men and women having good intentions about relationships, the various ways which we engage the opposite gender in the pursuit of "The One" can cause not only great harm and disservice to them, but to us as well.
Harris' book is based on sound biblical wisdom and draws from the experience and examples his and others' stories. A lot of them are romantic, most of them have touching endings to them, and each and every one has a very important point to be made. I consider myself a man after God's own heart, or at least a pursuer of it, but there were a lot of things that I was ignorant about before reading this book. Now, even prepping myself for a nasty, painful divorce and trying to start a new life in a foreign state, I feel confident that I will be able to keep my eyes on the prize: first, a dedicated life of service to God and all of His principles, and second, the preparation of a life to receieve the woman that He has custom-tailored exactly for me.
If you haven't read this book, then go buy, borrow, or otherwise acquire a copy of Boy Meets Girl. If you're single for any reason, it's a good read, but if you're married and still malleable, you can read through the book and find a lot of areas that should have been addressed when you were still single. Ideally, a couple should work through this book again when they start courting (you'll find out what the big deal about this courting thing is when you read the book), but it's never too late to apply God's principles for a happy marriage!
My hope is this: that I will develop my faith, my spiritual walk, and the rest of my life for God, and do so with my whole heart. I still dream of a wife (I'm married, but my wife is hardly a a wife at all, and she has already made the decision to be done with me). In fact, I dream of a wedding where I, too, look down the aisle at my bride and realize that there are no regrets in our relationship or our union. I dream of, for the first time in my entire life, being truly at peace with the young woman that God placed in my life (in His perfect timing).
If you're a woman who yearns for marriage, you should pick the book up as well. The book is aimed towards both genders, of course, but there are some very key points about femininity and about the roles husband and wife play in marriage. In the secular feminist society that we live in today, the roles of a man and a woman have been reversed and totally mutilated, rendering them unrecognizable in their current states. Men are weak, fragile, pathetic shells of what God intended, and women are taught to scorn the "traditional" roles of being a mother and homemaker in favor of pursuing careers and the lifestyle of a top-dog. Men don't know how to lead, women don't now how to submit, and neither know how to serve. Unfortunately, the Church is not immune to this, and the poison-laced tentacles of the world have infiltrated even the communities that we are so inclined to trust. I am not trying to say that this imperfection prevents a healthy union in the church - rather, I am implying that the marriage roles are something that definitely need to be addressed.
Personal standards have to change to God's standards. Why? Because our standards are often flawed and based on partially or wholly unimportant factors, we fail to recognize the spouse that God has planted before us - I've seen examples of this time and time again. In fact, I think I've been there, and might have "missed the train" initially in life (thankfully, God is merciful). Women need to develop a love for men not based on presupposed "ideal" qualifications, but rather taking into consideration such factors as, "He is a man I could see myself following," or, "He is a man that will always put God first in a marriage." Likewise, men should be able to calm themselves in order to hear from God, rather than being lead by the nose through their eyes and emotions.
If you've never read one of Joshua Harris' books and you're single, pick up I Kissed Dating Goodbye before you read Boy Meets Girl. The first book gives his perspective before marriage - why he decided to give up noncommital dating, what previous sinful issues he experienced before dedicating his life to God wholly, how he ended up meeting the woman of his dreams. The second book takes place after marriage, and is a recommended reading for the single, divorced, married, and widowed alike.
Read these books. If you've read them before, get your hands on a copy and go through them again. The principles are vital to a good marriage, and are better digested before than during or after.
Actually, this isn't about a post about an epic space opera. Rather, it's a declaration of hope in my life. Hope is about the only thing that keeps us going in times of tribulation. Hope is powered by faith and produces joy in times of weariness. Hope is a really freakin' good thing to have when you're deeply troubled.
I recently finished reading a book for the second time last night. You know those times where you pick up decently-sized book and finish it cover-to-cover in a single day? That was me with Joshua Harris' Boy Meets Girl. I think I've read it before - that, or he covers a lot of the same info from his book prior, I Kissed Dating Goodbye (which I would also highly recommend).
Anyway, Boy Meets Girl starts off telling Joshua Harris' personal experience with his pre-marriage life - his struggles, past failings and sins, and a revolutionary idea called "courtship." Antiquated as it may sound, courtship is, from what I have read and summised, perhaps the ideal way to develop a relationship with the opposite sex once you are in a position to consider marriage. Even in the Christian world and with many men and women having good intentions about relationships, the various ways which we engage the opposite gender in the pursuit of "The One" can cause not only great harm and disservice to them, but to us as well.
Harris' book is based on sound biblical wisdom and draws from the experience and examples his and others' stories. A lot of them are romantic, most of them have touching endings to them, and each and every one has a very important point to be made. I consider myself a man after God's own heart, or at least a pursuer of it, but there were a lot of things that I was ignorant about before reading this book. Now, even prepping myself for a nasty, painful divorce and trying to start a new life in a foreign state, I feel confident that I will be able to keep my eyes on the prize: first, a dedicated life of service to God and all of His principles, and second, the preparation of a life to receieve the woman that He has custom-tailored exactly for me.
If you haven't read this book, then go buy, borrow, or otherwise acquire a copy of Boy Meets Girl. If you're single for any reason, it's a good read, but if you're married and still malleable, you can read through the book and find a lot of areas that should have been addressed when you were still single. Ideally, a couple should work through this book again when they start courting (you'll find out what the big deal about this courting thing is when you read the book), but it's never too late to apply God's principles for a happy marriage!
My hope is this: that I will develop my faith, my spiritual walk, and the rest of my life for God, and do so with my whole heart. I still dream of a wife (I'm married, but my wife is hardly a a wife at all, and she has already made the decision to be done with me). In fact, I dream of a wedding where I, too, look down the aisle at my bride and realize that there are no regrets in our relationship or our union. I dream of, for the first time in my entire life, being truly at peace with the young woman that God placed in my life (in His perfect timing).
If you're a woman who yearns for marriage, you should pick the book up as well. The book is aimed towards both genders, of course, but there are some very key points about femininity and about the roles husband and wife play in marriage. In the secular feminist society that we live in today, the roles of a man and a woman have been reversed and totally mutilated, rendering them unrecognizable in their current states. Men are weak, fragile, pathetic shells of what God intended, and women are taught to scorn the "traditional" roles of being a mother and homemaker in favor of pursuing careers and the lifestyle of a top-dog. Men don't know how to lead, women don't now how to submit, and neither know how to serve. Unfortunately, the Church is not immune to this, and the poison-laced tentacles of the world have infiltrated even the communities that we are so inclined to trust. I am not trying to say that this imperfection prevents a healthy union in the church - rather, I am implying that the marriage roles are something that definitely need to be addressed.
Personal standards have to change to God's standards. Why? Because our standards are often flawed and based on partially or wholly unimportant factors, we fail to recognize the spouse that God has planted before us - I've seen examples of this time and time again. In fact, I think I've been there, and might have "missed the train" initially in life (thankfully, God is merciful). Women need to develop a love for men not based on presupposed "ideal" qualifications, but rather taking into consideration such factors as, "He is a man I could see myself following," or, "He is a man that will always put God first in a marriage." Likewise, men should be able to calm themselves in order to hear from God, rather than being lead by the nose through their eyes and emotions.
If you've never read one of Joshua Harris' books and you're single, pick up I Kissed Dating Goodbye before you read Boy Meets Girl. The first book gives his perspective before marriage - why he decided to give up noncommital dating, what previous sinful issues he experienced before dedicating his life to God wholly, how he ended up meeting the woman of his dreams. The second book takes place after marriage, and is a recommended reading for the single, divorced, married, and widowed alike.
Read these books. If you've read them before, get your hands on a copy and go through them again. The principles are vital to a good marriage, and are better digested before than during or after.
Jul 25, 2009
The Secret Ingredient
A man knelt at the altar of his hometown's local cathedral and cried.
For years, the man had searched for an answer. The answer, in fact, to all of his many problems in life. He prayed to God - prayed for peace, for hope, for blessing, for protection - but deep inside, his heart was constantly troubled. "Why does nothing work, Lord?" he cried out, begging for an answer to come from somewhere, anywhere.
Unknown to this man in his sorrow, the father of the parish stood off to one side, having approached the scene earlier. He had observed quietly, prayerfully, waiting for the proper moment to speak. At the man's request, the father spoke with a kind but firm tone. "Just what does the Lord have to do with it?"
The man, shaken from his state of mind, turned from the altar and looked up at the priest. "What do you mean, Father? My life belongs to God. Everything I do, every choice I make, ever step I take - all belong to Him. I would give everything I have for Him were he to require it, and I will choose to serve and love Him unconditionally, even with my dying breath." The man seemed to sober slightly at the declaration, confident.
A smile crossed the priest's lips. "It sounds to me like your heart is exactly where it needs to be. No one in his right mind could ever fault such statements. But I ask again, what does the Lord have to do with it?"
Standing, the man wiped his tear-stained cheeks and gave the priest a quizzical look. "What are you trying to say? The Lord has everything to do with it. Without Him, I am nothing. With Him, I can do anything and everything. I am the righteousness in Christ. He has everything to do with it!" The man repeated this statement more vehemently, raising his head to declare it more boldly.
Not backing down, the priest continued his engagement. "Alright. Let's say that the Lord does have something to do with it. What would He say about your particular predicament, whatever it may be?" The old man's smile turned into a wily grin and he raised an eyebrow to emphasize the question.
For a moment, the man stood and thought about the priest's question. "I'm not entirely sure. A few scriptures come to mind, but I can't remember them, exactly." With a matter-of-fact tone, he added, "But I know He has a lot to say about it. Everything you need to know for success is in the Bible, right?"
"Well," the priest took a few steps around the altar until is was between him and the man. "Yes, the Bible does contain a lot of wisdom, but were I to hand you a copy of it right now, would you even know where to look to find the answers you seek?"
After a moment, the man shook his head. "No, Father, I wouldn't. I'm no biblical scholar like you."
The father's eyes seemed to light up. "Ah, but that is the answer you seek." And without another word, he turned and began to head for the door.
Momentarily phased, the man hurried over to block the priest's retreat. "Father, wait. What do you mean? I don't have any of the answers. That's why I'm here."
A look of confusion crossed the priest's face. "But just a moment ago, you said that you were no biblical scholar," he smiled, "Like me. Yes?"
The man nodded. "Yes, Father."
"Then you have the answer you seek. You see, the Word of God is the only living text on the face of the earth. It moves like you do. It breathes like you do. It speaks like you do." He laid a age-withered hand on the man's shoulder. "But in order for it to do these things - move, breath, and speak - it needs to be in you."
The man's confused expression led the priest to continue. "You know the Word, but you do not know the Word. The fruits of the spirit, the manifestation of God's mighty hand in your life, and the answers to all of life's various conundrums are to be found in the Bible. No matter what you seek, what you require, or what is going on in your life, the single answer to all - excluding every other answer - is the Word. Where does faith come from, my son?"
Quickly, the man replied, "From hearing, and hearing of the Word of God."
"That exactly is my point. You have enough knowledge about the Word, but you do not know it in a biblical sense. Whenever the Word speaks about 'knowing' or 'to know,' it is referring to the deepest, most intimate, most intrinsic connection between two factors. You must know the Word. You must make it a part of every single day, first and foremost in your life. You must make it a part of your heart just like the flesh and blood that run through it on a daily basis. It must literally become a part of you."
The priest withdrew his hand and turned once more to leave, stopping at the door. "Therein lies your answer, my son. Discipline yourself to study diligently the Word, and often. Remember what you said about your life belonging to Him, and endeavor to prove it with your actions." And with that, he was gone.
~
What path in life will you take? Will you continue to cry out to God, seeking answers to life's problems in prayer, church, and other believers? Or will you realize that the only way to experience true peace, fulfillment, and victory in your life is to know God's word?
I used to spend so much time trying to live a Christian life. I'd say all the right things, believe all the right things, and desire all the right things. Inside, though, my spirit was malnourished and starving. I had no desire to read my Bible, no desire to peruse the scriptures other than to find this or that verse for encouragement or direction. In the end, not only did my efforts die in vain, but the destruction that was caused from encountering the world on a regular basis without a living Word in etched into my heart was extreme.
It was only after my life fell apart and I had nowhere else to turn that I began to consistently spend time in the Word. The transition is still in progress. I still don't spend as much time as I like, and I don't always put God first when my day begins, but I'm doing it more than I ever was. There will come a day when God will be foremost in every single aspect of my life. I'll breathe Him, think Him, speak Him, live Him. He in turn will walk with me every moment of every day, moving in my life and blessing me and those around me.
The Word is the secret ingredient. How much time we spend studying, digesting, and immersing ourselves in it will dictate how much victory we have in our day-to-day lives. Truth.
For years, the man had searched for an answer. The answer, in fact, to all of his many problems in life. He prayed to God - prayed for peace, for hope, for blessing, for protection - but deep inside, his heart was constantly troubled. "Why does nothing work, Lord?" he cried out, begging for an answer to come from somewhere, anywhere.
Unknown to this man in his sorrow, the father of the parish stood off to one side, having approached the scene earlier. He had observed quietly, prayerfully, waiting for the proper moment to speak. At the man's request, the father spoke with a kind but firm tone. "Just what does the Lord have to do with it?"
The man, shaken from his state of mind, turned from the altar and looked up at the priest. "What do you mean, Father? My life belongs to God. Everything I do, every choice I make, ever step I take - all belong to Him. I would give everything I have for Him were he to require it, and I will choose to serve and love Him unconditionally, even with my dying breath." The man seemed to sober slightly at the declaration, confident.
A smile crossed the priest's lips. "It sounds to me like your heart is exactly where it needs to be. No one in his right mind could ever fault such statements. But I ask again, what does the Lord have to do with it?"
Standing, the man wiped his tear-stained cheeks and gave the priest a quizzical look. "What are you trying to say? The Lord has everything to do with it. Without Him, I am nothing. With Him, I can do anything and everything. I am the righteousness in Christ. He has everything to do with it!" The man repeated this statement more vehemently, raising his head to declare it more boldly.
Not backing down, the priest continued his engagement. "Alright. Let's say that the Lord does have something to do with it. What would He say about your particular predicament, whatever it may be?" The old man's smile turned into a wily grin and he raised an eyebrow to emphasize the question.
For a moment, the man stood and thought about the priest's question. "I'm not entirely sure. A few scriptures come to mind, but I can't remember them, exactly." With a matter-of-fact tone, he added, "But I know He has a lot to say about it. Everything you need to know for success is in the Bible, right?"
"Well," the priest took a few steps around the altar until is was between him and the man. "Yes, the Bible does contain a lot of wisdom, but were I to hand you a copy of it right now, would you even know where to look to find the answers you seek?"
After a moment, the man shook his head. "No, Father, I wouldn't. I'm no biblical scholar like you."
The father's eyes seemed to light up. "Ah, but that is the answer you seek." And without another word, he turned and began to head for the door.
Momentarily phased, the man hurried over to block the priest's retreat. "Father, wait. What do you mean? I don't have any of the answers. That's why I'm here."
A look of confusion crossed the priest's face. "But just a moment ago, you said that you were no biblical scholar," he smiled, "Like me. Yes?"
The man nodded. "Yes, Father."
"Then you have the answer you seek. You see, the Word of God is the only living text on the face of the earth. It moves like you do. It breathes like you do. It speaks like you do." He laid a age-withered hand on the man's shoulder. "But in order for it to do these things - move, breath, and speak - it needs to be in you."
The man's confused expression led the priest to continue. "You know the Word, but you do not know the Word. The fruits of the spirit, the manifestation of God's mighty hand in your life, and the answers to all of life's various conundrums are to be found in the Bible. No matter what you seek, what you require, or what is going on in your life, the single answer to all - excluding every other answer - is the Word. Where does faith come from, my son?"
Quickly, the man replied, "From hearing, and hearing of the Word of God."
"That exactly is my point. You have enough knowledge about the Word, but you do not know it in a biblical sense. Whenever the Word speaks about 'knowing' or 'to know,' it is referring to the deepest, most intimate, most intrinsic connection between two factors. You must know the Word. You must make it a part of every single day, first and foremost in your life. You must make it a part of your heart just like the flesh and blood that run through it on a daily basis. It must literally become a part of you."
The priest withdrew his hand and turned once more to leave, stopping at the door. "Therein lies your answer, my son. Discipline yourself to study diligently the Word, and often. Remember what you said about your life belonging to Him, and endeavor to prove it with your actions." And with that, he was gone.
~
What path in life will you take? Will you continue to cry out to God, seeking answers to life's problems in prayer, church, and other believers? Or will you realize that the only way to experience true peace, fulfillment, and victory in your life is to know God's word?
I used to spend so much time trying to live a Christian life. I'd say all the right things, believe all the right things, and desire all the right things. Inside, though, my spirit was malnourished and starving. I had no desire to read my Bible, no desire to peruse the scriptures other than to find this or that verse for encouragement or direction. In the end, not only did my efforts die in vain, but the destruction that was caused from encountering the world on a regular basis without a living Word in etched into my heart was extreme.
It was only after my life fell apart and I had nowhere else to turn that I began to consistently spend time in the Word. The transition is still in progress. I still don't spend as much time as I like, and I don't always put God first when my day begins, but I'm doing it more than I ever was. There will come a day when God will be foremost in every single aspect of my life. I'll breathe Him, think Him, speak Him, live Him. He in turn will walk with me every moment of every day, moving in my life and blessing me and those around me.
The Word is the secret ingredient. How much time we spend studying, digesting, and immersing ourselves in it will dictate how much victory we have in our day-to-day lives. Truth.
Jul 23, 2009
Joy in the face of hardship
A lot has happened in the last few months. I've gotten kicked out of where I was living, got picked up like a stray on the road, spent a few solid weeks building on my spirit's foundation, considered and then rejected college, decided to move down to North Carolina, and on top of all of that, dealing with a wife that loathes me.
Yeah, things have been rough since I left the military. People have asked me, "Why don't you go back in? The economy is so bad! You need a stable income." Honestly? I'll make my own stable income, if that's what it takes, but I neither trust in nor operate in the secular economy. People think that a solid job and an environment they can control will produce peace and contentment, but that's a load of bull. I've had both, and neither brought me any sort of peace or contentment in the least. Of course, my wife was happy, but she doesn't know much about life, and as long as the money came in, that was all that mattered. When things fell apart for me and I began the recovery process, I found myself doing it alone.
You know, even though I love my wife with everything in me - a feat that not many on this earth know how to do, or have the power to do - I'm still stable. Being separated from someone who you've actually bonded with spiritually is like having a part of you ripped off violently. It's a shocking experience, and painful in the extreme. That is one reason why the Bible says, "Let no man tear asunder what God has joined together." There are major repercussions for both parties, even if they aren't immediately apparent. I know that even if my wife never changes, or changes too late to save our marriage, God is huge, mighty, and able. If He loves me more than I love my wife, then that's a pretty impressive love, and I will remain content and at peace with the knowledge that my path will be directed by Him.
People have called me naive in the past. I've also been labeled immature, senseless, and clueless. Why? Because my tendencies don't lean toward worrying, fretting, or even being concerned with my surroundings. When you walk in the peace of God, your surroundings no longer affect you like they used to. Instead of worrying, I have a Father to trust. I can remain firm in the understanding that no matter what path I walk, He will guide me and watch over me, and keep my mind centered on Him. What do you accomplish by being stressed and frustrated, anyway? Do you accomplish even a single task better? I am not moved by what I see or feel.
Here's the truth: "Don’t be dejected and sad, for the joy of the Lord is your strength!" That's right, I said joy. God gives us joy in the face of sorrow, courage in the face of tribulation, strength in the face of adversity. If God is for us, who can be against us?
Take the time today to inspect your life. Do you worry a lot? Are you always anxious about something? Does it take just one troubling though to get your feathers ruffled? Put those things on the altar. If you can't do anything about them, then do what you should have done in the first place: give them to your Father!
Yeah, things have been rough since I left the military. People have asked me, "Why don't you go back in? The economy is so bad! You need a stable income." Honestly? I'll make my own stable income, if that's what it takes, but I neither trust in nor operate in the secular economy. People think that a solid job and an environment they can control will produce peace and contentment, but that's a load of bull. I've had both, and neither brought me any sort of peace or contentment in the least. Of course, my wife was happy, but she doesn't know much about life, and as long as the money came in, that was all that mattered. When things fell apart for me and I began the recovery process, I found myself doing it alone.
You know, even though I love my wife with everything in me - a feat that not many on this earth know how to do, or have the power to do - I'm still stable. Being separated from someone who you've actually bonded with spiritually is like having a part of you ripped off violently. It's a shocking experience, and painful in the extreme. That is one reason why the Bible says, "Let no man tear asunder what God has joined together." There are major repercussions for both parties, even if they aren't immediately apparent. I know that even if my wife never changes, or changes too late to save our marriage, God is huge, mighty, and able. If He loves me more than I love my wife, then that's a pretty impressive love, and I will remain content and at peace with the knowledge that my path will be directed by Him.
People have called me naive in the past. I've also been labeled immature, senseless, and clueless. Why? Because my tendencies don't lean toward worrying, fretting, or even being concerned with my surroundings. When you walk in the peace of God, your surroundings no longer affect you like they used to. Instead of worrying, I have a Father to trust. I can remain firm in the understanding that no matter what path I walk, He will guide me and watch over me, and keep my mind centered on Him. What do you accomplish by being stressed and frustrated, anyway? Do you accomplish even a single task better? I am not moved by what I see or feel.
Here's the truth: "Don’t be dejected and sad, for the joy of the Lord is your strength!" That's right, I said joy. God gives us joy in the face of sorrow, courage in the face of tribulation, strength in the face of adversity. If God is for us, who can be against us?
Take the time today to inspect your life. Do you worry a lot? Are you always anxious about something? Does it take just one troubling though to get your feathers ruffled? Put those things on the altar. If you can't do anything about them, then do what you should have done in the first place: give them to your Father!
Jul 22, 2009
Whose body is it, anyway?
"The wife's body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband's body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife." (1 Corinthians 7:4)
Do you struggle with sexual impurity or immorality? Have you subscribed to the world's view of sex and intimacy, only to experience a sense of destruction, violation, and regret? Do you struggle to do what God's word says to do regarding your body, but still falter and fail on occasion?
I have good news for you. First and foremost, God has already given us victory over the world, and what it takes to receive that victory is an intimate relationship with Him. When we not only know His word in our head but stand on it in our hearts, no weapon formed against us will prosper. If honor, selflessness, and service motivate you, there's also another technique that I employ to keep myself on the straight path. Whenever I consider looking at something illicit, doing something shameful, or even doing something sinful with another person, I remember a pact I made with God. One day when I was in the shower (you men know how much of a temptation this position can be), I told Him, "Father, my body does not belong to me, but to my wife (or future wife). I will do nothing with it that she would not herself desire me to do with it. Likewise, I trust you to keep my heart pure and remind me when I remain faithful to You that I will never regret this choice, and will be rewarded when I am with my wife."
It worked. Every time I have the opportunity to look at pornography, to masturbate, or even to peruse the pictures and clips in my mind that have been planted there by prior sinful choices, I remember the covenant I made with God. "But, Zero," you say, "What if my spouse desires to do things that I just know aren't right in God's eyes?" I've been there. My wife and I actively considered a lot of destructive things in our intimate life, and we used to watch pornography together, too. If you're yoked with an unbelieving spouse, you can simply stand on God's word yourself, or if they're also a believer, you can share this scripture with them:
"But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people." (Ephesians 5:3, emphasis mine)
What is sexual immorality? Pornography is a good example. Homosexuality, bisexuality, multiple sex partners, and swinging are all very obviously destructive to a marriage, though they can be insidiously tempting. Obviously, anything sexual or dishonorable involving a person that you aren't married to is also an impurity (for those of you who are single and dating, even if you know that this is "the one" you are going to marry, keep your hands and your lips to yourself! You won't regret it, and you will if you don't). Anything that perverts the marriage bed - sex toys, bondage gear, and worse. Some would argue that sodomy - oral and anal sex - is biblically unsound. I can't comment on that one, but I will say this: the male penis fits the female vagina perfectly because that was how God designed intercourse to be. If you believe that anal sex or oral sex or both are wrong, then stay away from them - and the same goes if that is what your spouse believes. I have personal beliefs on the subject, but those are between a man, his wife, and God.
Finally, you might ask, "Zero, what if I'm not married? I know I should wait for my wife/husband and remain pure, but how can I operate that same way, especially when I don't know if my future wife/husband is remaining pure for me?" The truth is this: you will never regret remaining pure for your future spouse. If you are single, God has a person out there designed precisely to match you - all you need to do is let God prepare you for him/her. If you're separated, remain pure for your spouse's sake, and pray for God's will to be done in your marriage. If you're divorced, have faith - you didn't miss the boat! God has the perfect person for you and He will bring him or her to you when He says you're ready! Remain faithful to Him and to your future spouse, and remember that God is preparing him/her for you, and no matter what he or she has been through in their life, you will have no regrets about them, or about your choice to remain pure.
Praise God for his grace and mercy, because without it we would be lost to the sin of the world.
Do you struggle with sexual impurity or immorality? Have you subscribed to the world's view of sex and intimacy, only to experience a sense of destruction, violation, and regret? Do you struggle to do what God's word says to do regarding your body, but still falter and fail on occasion?
I have good news for you. First and foremost, God has already given us victory over the world, and what it takes to receive that victory is an intimate relationship with Him. When we not only know His word in our head but stand on it in our hearts, no weapon formed against us will prosper. If honor, selflessness, and service motivate you, there's also another technique that I employ to keep myself on the straight path. Whenever I consider looking at something illicit, doing something shameful, or even doing something sinful with another person, I remember a pact I made with God. One day when I was in the shower (you men know how much of a temptation this position can be), I told Him, "Father, my body does not belong to me, but to my wife (or future wife). I will do nothing with it that she would not herself desire me to do with it. Likewise, I trust you to keep my heart pure and remind me when I remain faithful to You that I will never regret this choice, and will be rewarded when I am with my wife."
It worked. Every time I have the opportunity to look at pornography, to masturbate, or even to peruse the pictures and clips in my mind that have been planted there by prior sinful choices, I remember the covenant I made with God. "But, Zero," you say, "What if my spouse desires to do things that I just know aren't right in God's eyes?" I've been there. My wife and I actively considered a lot of destructive things in our intimate life, and we used to watch pornography together, too. If you're yoked with an unbelieving spouse, you can simply stand on God's word yourself, or if they're also a believer, you can share this scripture with them:
"But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people." (Ephesians 5:3, emphasis mine)
What is sexual immorality? Pornography is a good example. Homosexuality, bisexuality, multiple sex partners, and swinging are all very obviously destructive to a marriage, though they can be insidiously tempting. Obviously, anything sexual or dishonorable involving a person that you aren't married to is also an impurity (for those of you who are single and dating, even if you know that this is "the one" you are going to marry, keep your hands and your lips to yourself! You won't regret it, and you will if you don't). Anything that perverts the marriage bed - sex toys, bondage gear, and worse. Some would argue that sodomy - oral and anal sex - is biblically unsound. I can't comment on that one, but I will say this: the male penis fits the female vagina perfectly because that was how God designed intercourse to be. If you believe that anal sex or oral sex or both are wrong, then stay away from them - and the same goes if that is what your spouse believes. I have personal beliefs on the subject, but those are between a man, his wife, and God.
Finally, you might ask, "Zero, what if I'm not married? I know I should wait for my wife/husband and remain pure, but how can I operate that same way, especially when I don't know if my future wife/husband is remaining pure for me?" The truth is this: you will never regret remaining pure for your future spouse. If you are single, God has a person out there designed precisely to match you - all you need to do is let God prepare you for him/her. If you're separated, remain pure for your spouse's sake, and pray for God's will to be done in your marriage. If you're divorced, have faith - you didn't miss the boat! God has the perfect person for you and He will bring him or her to you when He says you're ready! Remain faithful to Him and to your future spouse, and remember that God is preparing him/her for you, and no matter what he or she has been through in their life, you will have no regrets about them, or about your choice to remain pure.
Praise God for his grace and mercy, because without it we would be lost to the sin of the world.
Jul 21, 2009
Prosperity: What's the big deal?
If I had to take a wild, baseless guess as to how many people are living paycheck to paycheck, I'd estimate that three out of four have barely enough money to finish the month with. Unfortunately, believers like me aren't excluded from this statistic, even though the Bible speaks so much on blessing and prosperity.
But what exactly is prosperity?
You're going to have to take my word for it because I'm too tired right now to dig up scripture to support it, but prosperity is this: abundant excess and success in all areas of life. All areas. This includes money and finances, but is not limited to them. In fact, prosperity covers other areas such as marriage, mental and physical health, and emotional well-being. If you're rich but dying of cancer, then you're a poor rich man. If you're rich, healthy man with a broken spirit, then you are a broken man - forget about the money or health.
So, based on this description, perhaps 1% (likely less) of the population in America is prosperous. It's probably a fraction of that in reality, but as with the previous statistic, Christians are not immune, or even any better off. Why is it that the people whose faith is based on a belief that includes (but is certainly not limited to) blessings, miracles, and joy would likely be hard-pressed to give a recent example of any of the three in their lives?
The answer is simple: many believe a lie.
The lie leads the children of God to accept so much less than what their Father has for them in life. Some people think that it's not important or necessary to have real blessings and success this side of heaven. Others believe that in shouldering the yoke of poverty, they are somehow serving God's purpose in life. Yet more believe that prosperity is just something that greed-filled, fraudulent evangelists preach about to get rich. And these lies (and more - Satan is insidious, intelligent, and creative, always coming up with new spins on the same deception) rob Christians of what is their right this side of heaven - prosperity that overflows in excessive abundance.
This is the truth: it is God's will in our lives that we be blessed. And when I say "blessed," I do not just mean that He means for us to have our needs met. I mean that He wants to exceed our needs, overflow the reserves, and fill our lives with so much prosperity that it pours out onto the streets! Blessing is not just for us: it is for those around us, to be given generously.
God wants you to have more money than you can possibly use in a lifetime. God wants your marriage to be a dream come true. God wants you to live until you decide that you've lived long enough. God wants you to be a shining example of richness that the world will never forget. When you get to the point where your mind is deprogrammed of the belief of poverty and has instead been programmed with the belief of overflow prosperity, your circumstances will follow suit.
The mechanics are simple. First, believe what God's word says. Scour the bible for scriptures about prosperity or blessing, and then meditate on them. Brainwash yourself to the point where the old thought process of "good enough" and "not for me" is only a memory. Second, develop your relationship with God to the point where you are walking in obedience to Him. Third - and this is something that only God can direct you concerning - sow a seed. Like a farmer sows a seed expecting a harvest, sow a seed of some sort expecting a harvest. King David once said that he would never give the LORD an offering unless it was of personal cost to him.
The seed you sow is not always money, either. If your marriage is in dire straits and divorce seems imminent, then sow your spouse - that is, give him or her over to God entirely, so that God may work in the situation. Generally speaking, whatever you sow you reap multiplied back to you. This is where a close relationship with God is important, because only He can direct you what to sow in order to receive your breakthrough.
And don't forget to change the way you talk to match the Word that is in your heart! Instead of complaining about how broke you are, praise God for how rich you are. If your marriage is broken, bless your spouse in prayer and thank God for a rich, whole union. If you have any need, stand on the God's promises for you and praise Him for the fulfillment of them.
Remember, finally, as I said earlier: God blesses us so that we may bless others, and God blesses us for blessing others. Whatever you sow - be it money or food or even just a kind word - will bless us in return. We should give generously and give cheerfully, blessing just to be a blessing, not just to be blessed.
It's getting late, so I'm going to turn in for the night. Do not forget, though - God is no respecter of persons: His prosperity is for every single one of His children.
But what exactly is prosperity?
You're going to have to take my word for it because I'm too tired right now to dig up scripture to support it, but prosperity is this: abundant excess and success in all areas of life. All areas. This includes money and finances, but is not limited to them. In fact, prosperity covers other areas such as marriage, mental and physical health, and emotional well-being. If you're rich but dying of cancer, then you're a poor rich man. If you're rich, healthy man with a broken spirit, then you are a broken man - forget about the money or health.
So, based on this description, perhaps 1% (likely less) of the population in America is prosperous. It's probably a fraction of that in reality, but as with the previous statistic, Christians are not immune, or even any better off. Why is it that the people whose faith is based on a belief that includes (but is certainly not limited to) blessings, miracles, and joy would likely be hard-pressed to give a recent example of any of the three in their lives?
The answer is simple: many believe a lie.
The lie leads the children of God to accept so much less than what their Father has for them in life. Some people think that it's not important or necessary to have real blessings and success this side of heaven. Others believe that in shouldering the yoke of poverty, they are somehow serving God's purpose in life. Yet more believe that prosperity is just something that greed-filled, fraudulent evangelists preach about to get rich. And these lies (and more - Satan is insidious, intelligent, and creative, always coming up with new spins on the same deception) rob Christians of what is their right this side of heaven - prosperity that overflows in excessive abundance.
This is the truth: it is God's will in our lives that we be blessed. And when I say "blessed," I do not just mean that He means for us to have our needs met. I mean that He wants to exceed our needs, overflow the reserves, and fill our lives with so much prosperity that it pours out onto the streets! Blessing is not just for us: it is for those around us, to be given generously.
God wants you to have more money than you can possibly use in a lifetime. God wants your marriage to be a dream come true. God wants you to live until you decide that you've lived long enough. God wants you to be a shining example of richness that the world will never forget. When you get to the point where your mind is deprogrammed of the belief of poverty and has instead been programmed with the belief of overflow prosperity, your circumstances will follow suit.
The mechanics are simple. First, believe what God's word says. Scour the bible for scriptures about prosperity or blessing, and then meditate on them. Brainwash yourself to the point where the old thought process of "good enough" and "not for me" is only a memory. Second, develop your relationship with God to the point where you are walking in obedience to Him. Third - and this is something that only God can direct you concerning - sow a seed. Like a farmer sows a seed expecting a harvest, sow a seed of some sort expecting a harvest. King David once said that he would never give the LORD an offering unless it was of personal cost to him.
The seed you sow is not always money, either. If your marriage is in dire straits and divorce seems imminent, then sow your spouse - that is, give him or her over to God entirely, so that God may work in the situation. Generally speaking, whatever you sow you reap multiplied back to you. This is where a close relationship with God is important, because only He can direct you what to sow in order to receive your breakthrough.
And don't forget to change the way you talk to match the Word that is in your heart! Instead of complaining about how broke you are, praise God for how rich you are. If your marriage is broken, bless your spouse in prayer and thank God for a rich, whole union. If you have any need, stand on the God's promises for you and praise Him for the fulfillment of them.
Remember, finally, as I said earlier: God blesses us so that we may bless others, and God blesses us for blessing others. Whatever you sow - be it money or food or even just a kind word - will bless us in return. We should give generously and give cheerfully, blessing just to be a blessing, not just to be blessed.
It's getting late, so I'm going to turn in for the night. Do not forget, though - God is no respecter of persons: His prosperity is for every single one of His children.
Jul 19, 2009
The way of things...
Three days since I posted last. Too long!
In less than a week, I should be moving down south to meet up with a good friend of mine. I think this will help things a lot - not only will I have a good deal of spiritual involvement to feed on, but I'll have one of my best friends to screw around with. There's something to be said for best friends.
God showed me today, as I was listening to a teaching on breakthroughs, what He needed me to sow in order to reap a wife that loved me. It had to be something significant to me, something that was costly to lose and of great importance. The only thing that fit the bill was my wife, Danielle. I had to give her up completely - claim her as His, not mine. That's okay, though - He showed me that I was turning in a wife that didn't love me, respect me, or want me, and will be receiving in the future a wife that matches up with me perfectly. That was actually a pretty open-ended revelation, but God has a point. If Danielle isn't the one God has for me and she rebels against God long enough to produce a divorce, then I'm certain that whoever God has for me will be a hundred times better. Still, I do believe that Danielle is destined to walk beside me someday, and I have faith that God will work in her life and save her from the lies that she has been dwelling upon for years.
There comes a point where you just can't struggle, fight, or continue any further. It is at this point that God picks us up and carries us. You see, God can only work in our lives - whether it is to save us from our own destruction or to keep us on the straight and narrow path - when we come to the end of ourselves. One day, my wife will realize this. For now, I am content with the fact that I know it, and that I came to the end of myself a long time ago.
Seek first the Kingdom of God, and you know the rest.
I'm actually not breaking camp right now - I'm preparing to turn in. Night, ladies.
In less than a week, I should be moving down south to meet up with a good friend of mine. I think this will help things a lot - not only will I have a good deal of spiritual involvement to feed on, but I'll have one of my best friends to screw around with. There's something to be said for best friends.
God showed me today, as I was listening to a teaching on breakthroughs, what He needed me to sow in order to reap a wife that loved me. It had to be something significant to me, something that was costly to lose and of great importance. The only thing that fit the bill was my wife, Danielle. I had to give her up completely - claim her as His, not mine. That's okay, though - He showed me that I was turning in a wife that didn't love me, respect me, or want me, and will be receiving in the future a wife that matches up with me perfectly. That was actually a pretty open-ended revelation, but God has a point. If Danielle isn't the one God has for me and she rebels against God long enough to produce a divorce, then I'm certain that whoever God has for me will be a hundred times better. Still, I do believe that Danielle is destined to walk beside me someday, and I have faith that God will work in her life and save her from the lies that she has been dwelling upon for years.
There comes a point where you just can't struggle, fight, or continue any further. It is at this point that God picks us up and carries us. You see, God can only work in our lives - whether it is to save us from our own destruction or to keep us on the straight and narrow path - when we come to the end of ourselves. One day, my wife will realize this. For now, I am content with the fact that I know it, and that I came to the end of myself a long time ago.
Seek first the Kingdom of God, and you know the rest.
I'm actually not breaking camp right now - I'm preparing to turn in. Night, ladies.
Jul 16, 2009
The Big Lie
When I was two years old, my dad put a Nintendo controller in my hand, and ever since then I was hooked. I grew up with a variety of video game consoles, and what I didn't have in hand I played on a computer, one way or the other. I had no friends to speak of until I was almost eighteen, so the internet became my domain, my life. I knew more people online than I did in real life anyway.
Addiction is possibly one of the most diabolical ways that the enemy has to snare us and rob us of what God has for us. Some people are addicted to food, some to drugs, some to alcohol, some to pornography. Some are addicted to less obvious aspects: control; fear; self-pity; anger; even sorrow can be an addiction, because it produces in us a desirable emotional high. People don't see these things for themselves often as not, and when they do, they don't care enough to rid the parasite from their lives. Even when they do, a lot of people do not come to the realization that Jesus Christ freed us from the power of Satan, and that includes all of the lies that are fed to us, including, "This is just too good/desirable/addicting for me to let go of. I can't/won't do it."
A few months ago after my wife left, I was playing a particular video game, as I often did. I had recently decided to give up my computer because it was my main source of pornography, which had not only robbed my mind of healthy sexuality but also robbed me and my wife of intimacy. Anyway, I was sitting there with the controller in my hands and a thought hit me. All of the time I had put into that could have been spent in the Word of God, developing my spiritual relationship with my Creator (a relationship which unlocks blessing in my life), or could have been spent on blessing and loving my wife and child. I literally threw the controller across the ground - I haven't picked it up since, nor have I wanted to.
What brought this realization to me was undoubtedly the Holy Spirit. How do I know? That is the one thing in my life that has changed above all else. He shows me truth in matters. He brings light to my eyes. He keeps me on the path of life and blessing, rather than the path of death and curses.
And the enemy, Satan, has only one purpose: to keep us from that life, from that blessing. His only weapon is deception - he uses lies to keep us in the dark, defile us, and to cover his other lies. He lies to us every day, putting worry, fear, doubt, hatred, envy, selfishness, pride, and even sorrow into our minds. Jesus Christ died on the cross to defeat the enemy - an accomplishment that only the Son of God could pull off. And as one develops his or her foundation in the Word, one finds interesting truths: God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and of sound mind; Trusting in the lord will cause Him to guide all our steps; Seeking first the Kingdom of God will produce massive blessing and joy in your life; Love is the most powerful force in the universe, and the actual substance of God; As we accept the blessings God has for us, the world will envy us, not the other way around; The greatest leaders are the greatest servants; Pride (faith in ourselves) blocks faith in God; Christ has freed us from the power of sorrow and guilt. It's all in the Word. And the Word is living, powerful. The Bible is the only book on the face of the earth that breathes and lives.
Do you know anyone that is suffering from the lie of addiction? Do you know anyone that is suffering from any of the lies of Satan? When you were reading this, did a tiny voice scream inside of you, saying "That's me!"? If the former two, then I invite you to pray and intercede for those people, for the Lord hears the prayers of his people. And if you're the latter, the truth is this: As children of the Most High God, we are not subject to the power of sin and death, which covers every single lie of destruction that the devil has. God has the power to yank the wool from across your eyes and free you from EVERY aspect of the curse.
If you believe me, but don't think you're a child of God, then I have good news for you. One single step will doom the enemy's efforts in your life forever. As stated in Romans 10:9-10, if you confess with your mouth and believe in your heart that Jesus Christ is Lord - that he has died to free us from the power of death, and lives even now - and commit your heart to Him, then you are saved. The words don't matter as much as the heart, for from the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. If you feel like you need Him in your life, don't hesitate.
And now, I break camp. My journey continues.
Addiction is possibly one of the most diabolical ways that the enemy has to snare us and rob us of what God has for us. Some people are addicted to food, some to drugs, some to alcohol, some to pornography. Some are addicted to less obvious aspects: control; fear; self-pity; anger; even sorrow can be an addiction, because it produces in us a desirable emotional high. People don't see these things for themselves often as not, and when they do, they don't care enough to rid the parasite from their lives. Even when they do, a lot of people do not come to the realization that Jesus Christ freed us from the power of Satan, and that includes all of the lies that are fed to us, including, "This is just too good/desirable/addicting for me to let go of. I can't/won't do it."
A few months ago after my wife left, I was playing a particular video game, as I often did. I had recently decided to give up my computer because it was my main source of pornography, which had not only robbed my mind of healthy sexuality but also robbed me and my wife of intimacy. Anyway, I was sitting there with the controller in my hands and a thought hit me. All of the time I had put into that could have been spent in the Word of God, developing my spiritual relationship with my Creator (a relationship which unlocks blessing in my life), or could have been spent on blessing and loving my wife and child. I literally threw the controller across the ground - I haven't picked it up since, nor have I wanted to.
What brought this realization to me was undoubtedly the Holy Spirit. How do I know? That is the one thing in my life that has changed above all else. He shows me truth in matters. He brings light to my eyes. He keeps me on the path of life and blessing, rather than the path of death and curses.
And the enemy, Satan, has only one purpose: to keep us from that life, from that blessing. His only weapon is deception - he uses lies to keep us in the dark, defile us, and to cover his other lies. He lies to us every day, putting worry, fear, doubt, hatred, envy, selfishness, pride, and even sorrow into our minds. Jesus Christ died on the cross to defeat the enemy - an accomplishment that only the Son of God could pull off. And as one develops his or her foundation in the Word, one finds interesting truths: God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and of sound mind; Trusting in the lord will cause Him to guide all our steps; Seeking first the Kingdom of God will produce massive blessing and joy in your life; Love is the most powerful force in the universe, and the actual substance of God; As we accept the blessings God has for us, the world will envy us, not the other way around; The greatest leaders are the greatest servants; Pride (faith in ourselves) blocks faith in God; Christ has freed us from the power of sorrow and guilt. It's all in the Word. And the Word is living, powerful. The Bible is the only book on the face of the earth that breathes and lives.
Do you know anyone that is suffering from the lie of addiction? Do you know anyone that is suffering from any of the lies of Satan? When you were reading this, did a tiny voice scream inside of you, saying "That's me!"? If the former two, then I invite you to pray and intercede for those people, for the Lord hears the prayers of his people. And if you're the latter, the truth is this: As children of the Most High God, we are not subject to the power of sin and death, which covers every single lie of destruction that the devil has. God has the power to yank the wool from across your eyes and free you from EVERY aspect of the curse.
If you believe me, but don't think you're a child of God, then I have good news for you. One single step will doom the enemy's efforts in your life forever. As stated in Romans 10:9-10, if you confess with your mouth and believe in your heart that Jesus Christ is Lord - that he has died to free us from the power of death, and lives even now - and commit your heart to Him, then you are saved. The words don't matter as much as the heart, for from the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. If you feel like you need Him in your life, don't hesitate.
And now, I break camp. My journey continues.
Jul 15, 2009
For Better or For Worse
Today is going to be short and sweet.
If you're involved with someone and thinking about marriage, think twice. It's important to remember that dating or courting is one thing; marriage is an entirely different ball game. The world culture would like us to believe that marriage is something that can be gotten into and out of on a whim, but God's word states that marriage is a covenant - an unbreakable bond. Man and woman together become one flesh - that is to say, your union together will inescapably bind the two of you forever. I'm not just talking about sexual intimacy, but from the moment the two of you say, "I do," you had both be in it for the long haul, or the marriage is doomed.
My wife and I married two and a half years ago. Things were peachy while I was still in the military, supplying her with the funds to continue living. She bore my child while I was deployed, and then became accustomed to independent life without me. When I came back from Iraq and left the Army, things turned sour quickly. I needed my wife to support me, but she wasn't interested in someone that was mentally and emotionally broken, who was "going nowhere" in life. If she were anything like what a spouse is supposed to be, she would have stuck with me - and I guarantee that our marriage would be stronger now than ever, and more fulfilling as well.
In closing, marriage is vital. If you go into it lightly, without a sober view on what marriage is intended to be and how a husband and wife are supposed to operate, then remember that the mortality rate for that type of union is extreme. Not to say that you and your spouse can't pull together eventually and decide to really make it work (which, in my belief, requires a relationship with God, who teaches us unconditional love among other things), but in hindsight my marriage lasted two and a half years before my wife moved out, and if we had worked together at ALL during that period, things might have been saved.
Make sure you know your spouse and are not blinded by love before you marry. Save the blindness caused by love for after marriage, when you must learn to love and adore your spouses imperfections as well as his/her excellent points. Never, ever, ever fail to support your spouse. Marriage is not 50/50. It is 100/100, with both husband and wife giving everything they have to each other.
Time to break camp and roll. Out.
If you're involved with someone and thinking about marriage, think twice. It's important to remember that dating or courting is one thing; marriage is an entirely different ball game. The world culture would like us to believe that marriage is something that can be gotten into and out of on a whim, but God's word states that marriage is a covenant - an unbreakable bond. Man and woman together become one flesh - that is to say, your union together will inescapably bind the two of you forever. I'm not just talking about sexual intimacy, but from the moment the two of you say, "I do," you had both be in it for the long haul, or the marriage is doomed.
My wife and I married two and a half years ago. Things were peachy while I was still in the military, supplying her with the funds to continue living. She bore my child while I was deployed, and then became accustomed to independent life without me. When I came back from Iraq and left the Army, things turned sour quickly. I needed my wife to support me, but she wasn't interested in someone that was mentally and emotionally broken, who was "going nowhere" in life. If she were anything like what a spouse is supposed to be, she would have stuck with me - and I guarantee that our marriage would be stronger now than ever, and more fulfilling as well.
In closing, marriage is vital. If you go into it lightly, without a sober view on what marriage is intended to be and how a husband and wife are supposed to operate, then remember that the mortality rate for that type of union is extreme. Not to say that you and your spouse can't pull together eventually and decide to really make it work (which, in my belief, requires a relationship with God, who teaches us unconditional love among other things), but in hindsight my marriage lasted two and a half years before my wife moved out, and if we had worked together at ALL during that period, things might have been saved.
Make sure you know your spouse and are not blinded by love before you marry. Save the blindness caused by love for after marriage, when you must learn to love and adore your spouses imperfections as well as his/her excellent points. Never, ever, ever fail to support your spouse. Marriage is not 50/50. It is 100/100, with both husband and wife giving everything they have to each other.
Time to break camp and roll. Out.
Jul 13, 2009
Manliness versus Maleness
Days like this - days where nothing in particular goes wrong or right according to the naked eye - cause me to grow weary in spirit. It's almost as if the lack of anything to do or anything being done causes me to wane more than an activity-filled day or a busy work schedule would. One of the things I regret not having is a job, but as I see it, jobs in Michigan are scarce in the first place, and I'm planning on going to college half way across the country in exactly one month. Plus, any additional income would counter my generous unemployment benefits.
I wish it weren't this way. Though I risk regressing with this statement, if I could go back in time I would change many things, and one of them would be that I would have gotten a civilian job that I could discipline my time and energy towards. Instead, I enlisted. Most people these days think that the U.S. military is an excellent environment for recruits to obtain discipline, motivation, and confidence. I don't know what it is now. With such low standards for new recruits and with the environment itself being a highly liberal and politically correct one, I am dubious of the likelihood of such things.
But I digress. While I regret not having things such as employment or social status, my mind keeps coming full circle back to a glaring question: What is important in a man's life? What makes a difference between the fake pretenders that are simply "male" and the men who are what God wants them to be? Though I don't claim to have the answer - yet - I believe there are two definite earmark qualities that differentiate true "men" from mere "males."
1) Internal character
Of course, Godly character is a main contrasting point among any human being, male or female, but there are key features that separate the legit from the fake. If the world looks on the outside to determine worth, and God instead looks upon the inside (the heart), then I submit that one key quality of a true "man" is what is on the inside. That is to say, qualities such as compassion, the ability to show unconditional love, and faith are more important than good looks, substantial wealth, or a smooth tongue.
2) Reactions
They say that actions speak louder than words. What speaks louder than a man's actions are his reactions, or the manner in which he immediately responds to the actions (or reactions) of others around him. Does he lose his temper, speak cruelly, and act on a whim, or does he remain calm under stress or abuse, guard his tongue from evil, and choose his actions carefully before execution?
My life has been a search for truth - a quest for something real, something quality. For the years where I operated in the world culture, I was told many lies about myself, and I believed many if not all of them. The people who told me these lies, though, not only showed no Godly character but had great pain and destruction in their lives - and had no way to properly deal with it. Most of these men medicated themselves with alcohol, drugs, adrenaline, or women, and when one or all of those things failed them, some went the ultimate distance and took their own lives.
For the longest time, I walked the middle road - eschewing everything I knew would destroy me, but at the same time failing to acknowledge the only resource I had for life. In order to fill the gaps between the anxiety and the pain, I medicated myself with other addictions - ones that sapped time and energy away from me and my family. It was not until much later that I began to focus my attention on the real Source of peace that I began to experience it.
For the longest time I quested to become a real man. I am still on this quest. The journey has been difficult and confusing, but my deepest desire is to one day be a whole person, a fully-developed Christian that knows healthy masculinity. Not only am I better than what the world tells me - I am all that Jesus Christ says I am - but the people in my life deserve much better than a fake.
Ask yourself an important question, whether you are male or female: Are you real or fake?
The time has come to break camp once more and continue to the sojourn. May the blessing of God be upon all who read these words and heed the wisdom of the Holy Spirit. Amen.
I wish it weren't this way. Though I risk regressing with this statement, if I could go back in time I would change many things, and one of them would be that I would have gotten a civilian job that I could discipline my time and energy towards. Instead, I enlisted. Most people these days think that the U.S. military is an excellent environment for recruits to obtain discipline, motivation, and confidence. I don't know what it is now. With such low standards for new recruits and with the environment itself being a highly liberal and politically correct one, I am dubious of the likelihood of such things.
But I digress. While I regret not having things such as employment or social status, my mind keeps coming full circle back to a glaring question: What is important in a man's life? What makes a difference between the fake pretenders that are simply "male" and the men who are what God wants them to be? Though I don't claim to have the answer - yet - I believe there are two definite earmark qualities that differentiate true "men" from mere "males."
1) Internal character
Of course, Godly character is a main contrasting point among any human being, male or female, but there are key features that separate the legit from the fake. If the world looks on the outside to determine worth, and God instead looks upon the inside (the heart), then I submit that one key quality of a true "man" is what is on the inside. That is to say, qualities such as compassion, the ability to show unconditional love, and faith are more important than good looks, substantial wealth, or a smooth tongue.
2) Reactions
They say that actions speak louder than words. What speaks louder than a man's actions are his reactions, or the manner in which he immediately responds to the actions (or reactions) of others around him. Does he lose his temper, speak cruelly, and act on a whim, or does he remain calm under stress or abuse, guard his tongue from evil, and choose his actions carefully before execution?
My life has been a search for truth - a quest for something real, something quality. For the years where I operated in the world culture, I was told many lies about myself, and I believed many if not all of them. The people who told me these lies, though, not only showed no Godly character but had great pain and destruction in their lives - and had no way to properly deal with it. Most of these men medicated themselves with alcohol, drugs, adrenaline, or women, and when one or all of those things failed them, some went the ultimate distance and took their own lives.
For the longest time, I walked the middle road - eschewing everything I knew would destroy me, but at the same time failing to acknowledge the only resource I had for life. In order to fill the gaps between the anxiety and the pain, I medicated myself with other addictions - ones that sapped time and energy away from me and my family. It was not until much later that I began to focus my attention on the real Source of peace that I began to experience it.
For the longest time I quested to become a real man. I am still on this quest. The journey has been difficult and confusing, but my deepest desire is to one day be a whole person, a fully-developed Christian that knows healthy masculinity. Not only am I better than what the world tells me - I am all that Jesus Christ says I am - but the people in my life deserve much better than a fake.
Ask yourself an important question, whether you are male or female: Are you real or fake?
The time has come to break camp once more and continue to the sojourn. May the blessing of God be upon all who read these words and heed the wisdom of the Holy Spirit. Amen.
Jul 12, 2009
What price, victory?
When I was a child, I thought as a child, spoke as a child, acted as a child. Now that I am grown...
Most of us with even a little life experience under our belts would admit some regret about the past. "If I could go back in time knowing what I know now, what a different set of choices I'd make," we often lament. It is said that hindsight is 20/20. There is truth to that. But a higher truth is this: If we learn from our mistakes, are we not able to produce better results in the future? No sin, no failure, no loss - no matter how great it may seem - is insurmountable in the face of God.
Yes, I am a Christian. I haven't always been this way, you know. When I was in my late teens, I experienced an event that caused me to stare into the sky and question God's existence. "If you exist, God, you'd best make yourself real to me. Otherwise, I'm going to leave this whole belief at the wayside and live life the way I think it should be lived," I said. Wouldn't you know that my mind was already made up and my path was already set, but He had other plans - and in my experience, my Father always gets his way.
Though God did light a flame in my heart some nights later - one that put an unyielding desire to know Him inside me - my life for the next few years would be a hard, rocky, and regret-filled existence. I fell in love with a non-believer, joined the military, and eventually had a son. I experienced rejection, fear, loss of any sort of self-worth or self-esteem, and confusion. I lost face in front of everyone I'd ever known (if I had ever had any to begin with), including my wife. Since she wasn't spirit-filled, came from a background of abuse and divorce, and had just as much baggage coming into the marriage as I did, my marriage began to see trouble early on that eventually drew my wife away from me to lead her own life, separately.
It was only after I left the military and came to the end of myself for the final time that I began to seek God with every aspect of my being, with every breath, with every thought. I moved in with my parents (which, in retrospect, probably did nothing but damage my self-image, motivation, and relationship with my wife). I spent every waking hour either praying, reading the word, battling my flesh, or pondering what I knew about God. I began to attend a fellowship for men at the local Christian mission in a nearby town, and through interaction with other Christians, began to develop and nurture the seeds of faith which had been sown in my heart since I was a child.
It was there that God showed me what true agape love is. Unfortunately, it was too late to save my marriage, as my wife had already decided that I wasn't a man worth being married to. Ironic: the more I laid hold of the tools required to repair my marriage, the more distant my wife became. Likely, this had a lot to do with her status as an unbeliever - something that I'm praying about every night. Someone once told me that light and dark cannot coexist, and while I'm hesitant to say anything judgemental about my wife, she does not lead a Christian walk, namely because (unless I am mistaken) she is not a born-again believer. The devil does work overtime to steal the Word that I attempt to sow into her life, and she refuses to hear or believe.
Recently, I had come to the point where all I was doing was throwing myself up against a brick wall. Insanity is defined as doing the same thing repeatedly while expecting different results. Since God gave me a sound mind, insanity is obviously not what I should be operating under. I had to give up Danielle, my precious wife, to Him completely. It's still a struggle - the pain is still there, and there are many wounds that will have to be healed. I do not know at this point whether Danielle and I will ever reunite, but whatever happens, my heart belongs to God.
And I will trust in Him.
Recently I've been speaking more faith over my life. It is said that faith is the evidence of things unseen. I do not see things in my life with my natural observation, but the more I spend time in the Word of God and meditate on His promises, the more real they become. I will continue to speak the Word over my life, and I believe that God will cut out the seeds of unbelief that have taken up root in my heart over the years. The Tree of Life, as it is described, is the only vegetation I allow to grow in my heart now.
The foundation of my story having been laid, I break camp and sojourn once more. To God be the glory forever. Amen.
Most of us with even a little life experience under our belts would admit some regret about the past. "If I could go back in time knowing what I know now, what a different set of choices I'd make," we often lament. It is said that hindsight is 20/20. There is truth to that. But a higher truth is this: If we learn from our mistakes, are we not able to produce better results in the future? No sin, no failure, no loss - no matter how great it may seem - is insurmountable in the face of God.
Yes, I am a Christian. I haven't always been this way, you know. When I was in my late teens, I experienced an event that caused me to stare into the sky and question God's existence. "If you exist, God, you'd best make yourself real to me. Otherwise, I'm going to leave this whole belief at the wayside and live life the way I think it should be lived," I said. Wouldn't you know that my mind was already made up and my path was already set, but He had other plans - and in my experience, my Father always gets his way.
Though God did light a flame in my heart some nights later - one that put an unyielding desire to know Him inside me - my life for the next few years would be a hard, rocky, and regret-filled existence. I fell in love with a non-believer, joined the military, and eventually had a son. I experienced rejection, fear, loss of any sort of self-worth or self-esteem, and confusion. I lost face in front of everyone I'd ever known (if I had ever had any to begin with), including my wife. Since she wasn't spirit-filled, came from a background of abuse and divorce, and had just as much baggage coming into the marriage as I did, my marriage began to see trouble early on that eventually drew my wife away from me to lead her own life, separately.
It was only after I left the military and came to the end of myself for the final time that I began to seek God with every aspect of my being, with every breath, with every thought. I moved in with my parents (which, in retrospect, probably did nothing but damage my self-image, motivation, and relationship with my wife). I spent every waking hour either praying, reading the word, battling my flesh, or pondering what I knew about God. I began to attend a fellowship for men at the local Christian mission in a nearby town, and through interaction with other Christians, began to develop and nurture the seeds of faith which had been sown in my heart since I was a child.
It was there that God showed me what true agape love is. Unfortunately, it was too late to save my marriage, as my wife had already decided that I wasn't a man worth being married to. Ironic: the more I laid hold of the tools required to repair my marriage, the more distant my wife became. Likely, this had a lot to do with her status as an unbeliever - something that I'm praying about every night. Someone once told me that light and dark cannot coexist, and while I'm hesitant to say anything judgemental about my wife, she does not lead a Christian walk, namely because (unless I am mistaken) she is not a born-again believer. The devil does work overtime to steal the Word that I attempt to sow into her life, and she refuses to hear or believe.
Recently, I had come to the point where all I was doing was throwing myself up against a brick wall. Insanity is defined as doing the same thing repeatedly while expecting different results. Since God gave me a sound mind, insanity is obviously not what I should be operating under. I had to give up Danielle, my precious wife, to Him completely. It's still a struggle - the pain is still there, and there are many wounds that will have to be healed. I do not know at this point whether Danielle and I will ever reunite, but whatever happens, my heart belongs to God.
And I will trust in Him.
Recently I've been speaking more faith over my life. It is said that faith is the evidence of things unseen. I do not see things in my life with my natural observation, but the more I spend time in the Word of God and meditate on His promises, the more real they become. I will continue to speak the Word over my life, and I believe that God will cut out the seeds of unbelief that have taken up root in my heart over the years. The Tree of Life, as it is described, is the only vegetation I allow to grow in my heart now.
The foundation of my story having been laid, I break camp and sojourn once more. To God be the glory forever. Amen.
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